walking through seasons of spiritual dryness
joy joy joy joy joy joy!! =)
That was the subject heading to an e-mail I wrote to my best friend and future wife after having one of the most powerful spiritual experiences in my life. I tried to describe how I felt:
walk or crawl?
After enduring a few years of this desert season, I wonder if I could believe again. How will I find my way after feeling so lost? Then, I come across a journal entry – a letter actually – that I wrote to myself for encouragement. It reminds me of the faith I once had and am humbled.
now I know…
I had to read it in the Bible before I saw it alive in my life. I encountered the concept of sustaining grace as I studied the story of the widow of Zarephath in 1 Kings 17, but it would take the next 20 years to see its truth revealed in my life. Let’s study the text first:
footprints in the sand
The poem, “Footprints in the Sand” is probably one of the most well-known inspirational poems in circulation. It is known by Christians and non-Christians; you see it on posters, mugs, and greeting cards. What has made this poem so popular is not marketing or commercials. In its most widely circulated form only the words Author Anonymous take credit for the poem. No, this poem is well known because of its simple and powerful message:
sustaining grace by Vaneetha
I see it in contrast to delivering grace by Vaneetha Rendall Risner in her post “The Gift of Sustaining Grace.”
no one is self-sufficient
I need sustaining grace because I am not self-sufficient. No one is self-sufficient. I cannot find a similar or corroborating interpretation to Luke 4 by any scholar, pastor, blogger or bliblical commentary anywhere in print or on the internet. Jesus quotes the saying, ‘Physician, heal thyself!’ I think I have an original thought. What do you think?
your only if
This is a special edition post. Before we move forward, I want to take a break and take a deep breath with you. So whatever you’re doing right now, after you come to the end of this sentence, take two long breaths in and out.
rediscovering God’s purpose
How does God deal with us during the desert season? He loves us, but what does that love look like and can it really be a deeper kind of love? Another day passes in my desert season, and there’s no relief sight. I search for my friend Ulaama’s gift to me, a bookmark with the bible verse Isaiah 58:11 written in Mongolian:
i’m in love with God!
“I’m in love with God,” I think to myself as I go about the ordinary things in my life: school, homework, and dinner. I’m haunted by these memories where I don’t know what I am thinking. I don’t understand what I was feeling. Am I really feeling the emotion of love toward an invisible Being that I believe exists and loves me too?
not a girlfriend
It’s in the most pain-filled moments I realize that God is my Portion. When that one thing I’ve been putting my hope in for happiness - my life and my salvation - dies, I see. And as I give it up to the Lord, I understand what is not my Portion and Who is.
not success
The seeds of seeking God as my Portion continue in high school. I lay down my next only if at the Lord’s feet as I give up success, and something, or rather Someone, as my portion again.
not comfort
Seeking God as my Portion continues to grow through the most excruciating and painful experiences in my life. I’m sick to my stomach after having drunk some well water from a small Ethiopian village. I know what you’re thinking, why in the world would I drink unfiltered water from a well in a small Ethiopian village?
God as your Portion - what you are asking for
The way to enjoy the desert season is to align with God’s purpose for leading you into a desert time. The first purpose is so that you would know God as your Portion. It is a lot easier to crystallize some of the things that we lay down (what we are not asking for) when we seek God as our Portion, but what exactly are we asking for? Are we asking for an experience? An encounter? A revelation? To see his face? To see his glory? To know him?
to encounter Him
When God Himself is our Portion, it means we are seeking to know Him, not just know more about Him. We are seeking an encounter and many encounters with God that will transform our perspectives and change our lives.
to be seekers
We are asking to be God chasers, to be placed in the position where we are to seek Him out. We are asking to be active pursuers in this relationship looking for Him in the places he normally resides, looking at his tracks, hoping for a true encounter.
for intimacy
One word picture for the intimacy we are asking for with Him is to seek His face. We contrast seeking God’s face to seeking the works of His hands, which paints a picture of longing for intimacy with God for its own sake, rather than seeking God for what he can do for us.
i’m not through with you yet
I’ll never forget the first time someone spoke to me about character growth. I was home from a short-term mission trip to Ethiopia I took right after my freshman year of college. I planned on using the remaining time in the summer to help out the youth group of my church. The youth pastor and I had finished talking about what my role would be that summer, and then he said, “you know what this time in your life is about, J. Thomas? It’s about growing in character.” I simply nodded in agreement, not knowing what he meant or how to respond. Then after a few moments of thoughtful consideration, I built up the courage to ask him, “Pastor, do you see anything specific in my character that needs to be worked on?”
container for God Himself
Passion for heart-character growth comes from that burning desire for God Himself, and from knowing what His primary purpose for building heart-character is: to give us more of Himself. Often in the church we use others terms for character growth like “growing in Christ-likeness” and “sanctification.”
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The concept of character and character growth is one of the least understood ideas in effective Christian living. It is the least understood because it has incredible depth.
story of persevering (part 1)
I believe there is no other story in the Bible that conveys a persevering spirit during a desert season better than the one recorded in Matthew 15:21-28. A Gentile woman came to Jesus begging him to help her. A Canaanite woman from that vicinity came to him, crying out.
story of persevering (part 2)
In the gap of that silence, there comes a message, not from God but from the world. So his disciples came to him and urged him, “Send her away, for she keeps crying out after us.”
Currently reminding myself…
This too shall pass.